From: CA, United States
Genre: Christian/Gospel, HIP HOP, Rap
MAC stands for Man After Christ and looking for the King is killing me as i live for Him...
Robert May, music artist known as MAC May was born May 1st, 1989 in MontClair California; however, he grew up in San Diego and calls this city his home. Reflecting back on his childhood MAC May states, "I remember coming home from school to a house flooded with the warmth of Gospel music, but the warmth was just the calm before the storm... Far to many sleepless nights." As the sun rays of the day faded away, so did the light in MAC May's father's eyes. MAC May explains, "I know many people have experienced much more excruciating abuse than I but the mental abuse left me confused and apathy took root deep inside of me." As a young boy, his "father son talks" were far from what most dads should be teaching their young boys, especially in a "Christian" home. "It was almost as if my dad was trying to brain wash me. Filling my head with inappropriate mischief and encouraging me to take advantage of girls and told me they aren't worth anything. I remember he would get me up in the middle of the night and drill this nonsense into my brain like clock work. I had no way of running away from it, hes my dad he is suppose to teach me how to grow up in life," Mac May explains. As long as he could remember MAC May said this went on night after night. Also, he described what he saw one night while his dad spoke with him. He said, " I'm not sure if i was just really tired but one night when my dad was telling me a misconstrued lesson about respect, i saw the evil in his eyes and his face began to transform right before my eyes... My first thought was, 'devil' and all of a sudden i felt weak like i was going to pass out;however, its was because i had forgotten to breath." Not to long after he said around the age of 10 he locked himself in his room and tried to read the entire Bible. After weeks of reading he made it through the Torah but decided to give up because he knew not of its significance.
"My mother Sharon May saturated my brothers and I with scriptures and stories but i started to look to how my big bro Bryan McFadden portrayed himself in my desire to want to become a man because that was something my mom could not give," MAC May exclaims. After years of looking to a false example of a man, apathy is what truly acted as the umbrella that kept him dry of Jesus Christ's blood and forgiveness.
MAC May further states, "One day i was walking with one of my homeboys, Laron Rush, and this man in a polo shirt and khakis approached us asking if we knew who Jesus was and to what church we went to. Without thinking, i said 'the one my momma goes to,' no smart talk intended. I went on, 'He died for my sins and rose three days later." The man was so happy to hear my reply he gave me a little orange Bible only containing the new testament. After walking away i had this grin on my face because i felt like i told him, how dare he question me about Christ, and i continued my day thinking of evil plots for the future."
After his first physical encounter with the opposite sex in middle school he felt split mentally, constantly hearing the voices of his dad and mother in his head fighting on how to treat girls. Then high school came. Although MAC May was never a drinker or smoker, he began to hang out with people that did and soon after he joined the lifestyle of partying, sex, and illicit activities. MAC May states, "I never really felt like i was doing wrong because every time i turned around i was told i was a good person, but in whose eyes." After his graduation in 2007 from Mount Miguel High School, he began to have conviction about having sex outside of marriage. He states, " i remember one day i went to my ex girlfriends mom's house to pick her up for work with sex no where near my thoughts; however, things turned out different than what i planed. She wanted to and i felt obligated to consent because we were together for 'so long' that was the first time in my life i felt the sinful nature of mankind. I knew and believed that God saw what i was doing and i literally felt disgusted and tears came from my eyes... Trying to be a man I hid them, but after talks with the 'men' i looked up to lead me in the wrong direction and my heart became hardened and i continued my lustful sin lifestyle."
Many people believe they are Christians because they once repeated a prayer or was told about Christ but that couldn't be father from the truth. Just because you're in medical school doesn't make you a doctor.
"Time went on and i had been reading my Bible the entire time. I moved to Pomona to attend a trade school and that separation from everything and everyone helped me become still and hear God. It was like i fell into a spiritual coma and was exposed for what i was, a sinful little boy, who manipulated to obtain the desires of my heart. I felt deep grief, there was a massive amount of pain that bubbled up inside of me while i was reading Ephesians. The feeling was as if God reached into my flesh and ripped me out of me, the pain cased me to fall to the ground. on the ground prostrate and helpless, i cried out and began to wail in repentance. soon after, i felt a calm, a peace in side of me... My heart had became a resting place for my King, but i felt so unworthy of Him, " MAC May explained the true turning point in his life.
Just because we know who Jesus is does not mean Jesus' blood is over our lives because we have to not only believe in Him but truly seek Him. MAC May further comments, "From then on i hated sin and did not desire to compromise with worldly living."